I Betrayed Those Whom I Loved

from The Hell We Have Chosen by Strixskog

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lyrics

Frozen is the path through these memories
My mind is cold torment a place where I am forced to walk
Encased like statues the past reaches out
Their eyes and hands filled with anguish and sorrow

I turn my head from the ones I left
I close my eyes to the deeds I’ve done
I look at what I’ve built in the place of those I cared
A monument of sand are my achievements
and my sorrow is the coming tide
I am crushed, battered in the storm of my own making

My pallid mask veils the great deceit
I am not content, I have no peace, I am not proud of who and what I am
I betrayed those whom I love
I betrayed all that I stood for
I weep alone in this world devoid of love
A world I created for my own

The mouths of man
They recognize what I’ve achieved
Parasitic sycophants say:
what I’ve burned is worth what I’ve made
But I see clay running through my fingers
I try to create but it all just falls apart
I know the truth
The fear I dare not speak
This life is wasted
and it’s me who threw it away

The things I cared for the ones I needed
most
In my dreams they bleed and scream my name
I did not kill them but I cut them just the same
Now I’m alone in dark, in pain
Buried in a tomb
Built of my shame

Who can lift this crushing weight
Who can lift the sorrow off my back
Will no one help, will no one lend a hand?
They all are gone
And I’m to blame
I chose this life
I dug my grave
I burned the bridges.
That I made
I can’t go back
Can’t be forgave
I hate myself
I hate the strife
I chose the world
Over life

Now all is silence
All is cold
The end is near
This death foretold
My sorrow hangs
Around my neck.
The rope I use
To hang my self
The world I chose
To leave behind
Has nothing left
I cannot hide
The spirits crushed
Beneath my boots
The ones I spurned
The ones I used
They do not watch
They do not cheer
There is no one
That I hold dear
Now all is cold
The frost entombs
Oblivion
My mind consumes
Now all is cold
Now all is not numb
It is the the end
Forgive me all
The ones
I left behind

credits

from The Hell We Have Chosen, released January 18, 2023

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